EFT Surrogate Tapping or Proxy Tapping - Q & A 'Secret Tapping'

Yes, I've heard Gary Craig say that we can do surrogate EFT tapping for someone else without their permission. However, I have also heard that if someone does not want to make a change, it will have no effect. In that case it's like sending a blessing or prayer their way, which is beneficial for both the sender and receiver.

If we insist on tapping for someone who is fully capable of doing EFT or something else to help themselves physically, mentally and/or emotionally such as; meditation, self-hypnosis, Tai Chi etc. *and* they're not wiling to make an effort, then we need to ask our self...

Q-1- Do I care more about this person's health and wellbeing then they do themselves?

If the answer is 'yes', then we can wind up losing a lot of energy here. Being 'hooked' or co-dependant to someone else's wellness will not serve us well... or them!

Doing a few tapping rounds on this i.e. caring more than they do, is a great thing to do. Here are several more powerful questions...

Q-2 - Why am I investing my time and energy into this?

Q-3 - If they did tap for themselves, what would this mean for them. What would this mean to me?

Q-4 - What is the biggest benefit for me, if they tapped?

Q-5 - What is the upside if I do the tapping?

Q-6 - What is the downside if I don't tap for them?

Q-7 - Does their wellness have an affect on my own health, happiness and personal peace?

The answers to these questions can be very revealing and bring conscious awareness and helpful realizations about our relationship with this person. This exercise may also assist us in identifying why we get stuck, confused or troubled in other areas of our life. Maybe we are addicted to trying to 'fix' others?

As author Byron Katie says, "If I'm over there in someone else's business... who's over here taking care of mine?"

This is a very important issue for some of us. Sometimes it is the main reason our own health is not optimal -- we are spending *way* too much time in other peoples business and not enough time taking care of our own.

It feels pretty good to be a loving and caring person however, when our love and caring shifts to co-dependency, we can jeopardize our own health, happiness and peace of mind. We absolutely need to make it our number one priority to put our own health and wellbeing ahead of all else!

2) Detach from the outcome. Keep our intentions and personal desires OUT of surrogate EFT tapping.

If we realize that we won't be able to remain detached and keep our feelings about the other person's wellness or 'business', then we are better to avoid surrogate tapping and continue to do the EFT tapping on our own 'stuff'.

If we proceed because we feel fairly clear or detached and something emotional does come up while surrogate tapping, then we need to begin tapping for ourselves, on our own issues.

If we get 'triggered' emotionally, it probably means we have an investment in the other person's wellness. It's powerful and very healing exercise to tap on and clear some of our attachment and dependency issues. Gaining relief in this area usually results in many positive effects and life changes!

3) 2 ways to do EFT surrogate tapping

a) As if we are the other person, "Even though 'I' have this____"

b) Refer to them, "Even though 'person's name' has this ____"

4)Things to do EFT surrogate tapping on...

PHYSICAL: pain or uncomfortable sensations; tension, tightness, pinching, tingling, burning, numbness, swelling, inflammation, throbbing, stinging etc.

EMOTIONAL: stressful/negative emotions; worry, overwhelm, frustration, fear, loss, guilt, panic, sadness, anger, rage, blame, resentment, depression, powerlessness etc.

MENTAL: stressful/negative thoughts; 'Its not a peaceful world' - 'My memory is shot' - 'My investments are at risk' - 'Times are tough' - 'I'm drowning in debt' - I am such a looser' - 'I repel money' - 'I am unlovable' - 'Everyone is out to get me'... etc.

It can be much more effective when we associate a negative emotion i.e. worry with an uncomfortable body sensation i.e. tension in the chest. Attempt to plug into the person's 'energy body' or we can just take a guess, whatever pops into our mind.

Get an intensity on the 0 to 10 scale and then tap on this feeling i.e. "Even though I worry and feel this tension in my chest"... I deeply... and completely... Body points: this worry and tension in my chest... this worry and tension in my chest... and so on.

When we tap on a thought or belief, we still use the 0 - 10 scale. But instead we use 'truth'... it works like this; On a scale of 0 to 10 how true is this statement for the other person? "I am secure about our retirement investments". 0 being not secure at all and 10 being totally true... being 100% secure. Again, just take a guess if an answer does not pop into your mind.

Whether we are tapping for ourselves of surrogate tapping, doing EFT on negative thoughts or limiting beliefs can take a bit of practice. What we are looking for, are new, more positive ways of thinking about the situation at hand -- this is referred to as a 'turn around', cognitive shift or reframe. If progress is not being made, then stick with the less complex techniques i.e. tapping on negative emotions and body sensations/pain.

And finally, if we know of any negative circumstances or events in the person's childhood that may be a contributing factor to their current problems or worries, then these can be great topics to do surrogate EFT tapping on.

I hope this article has helped you. To find out when brand new EFT articles, scripts and tapping tips appear on this web site, you can subscribe to the 'email alerts'. (See the P.S. below.)

To your tapping success! Karen